I wish...if I could turn back the clock...
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I would be more accepting of my son’s condition, and not push him and myself the way I did, with so much therapy and extreme desperation on my part, to see him improve….”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, one of the things I would like to do is to spend more quality time coaching and involving my son with real life daily activities rather than rushing around to fill him up with various therapy and classes.”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I would start talking to more parents and be open to more options and activities for my children. Rather than keeping to myself.”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I would give my son more hugs, more love, more understanding. I would make him feel that he is unconditionally accepted and that he is a blessing.”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I would stop working and be with my boy.”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I’d be more relaxed with my son, bringing him out to play a lot more than being cooped up at home feeling overwhelmed. I would teach him life skills instead of trying to meet academic demands, journey with other SN mums more, and pray more. Jia you everyone!”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock ,I would spend a lot more time teaching my daughter life skills that can lead to self care independence, like bathing, washing clothes, folding clothes, general cleaning (if her abilities can match up) rather than on academic programs like reading and writing skills which she still could not. Regardless what program your child is in, having a joyful time interacting purposefully with your child is what matters + caregiver’s self care. (My daughter has moderate-severe autism, non-verbal with a bit of hypotonicity)”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I would let her start taking up household responsibilities at a much younger age at 5 years old. Let her wash her plastic cups, plates etc. I let her do her laundry using a washing machine at age 10. Believe your child can start early even though it may be messy a bit. They can do it. Just slow and not perfect.”
“I wish…if I could turn back the clock, I wish I had started earlier with XX but instead he was given so much entitlement and we were putting him into many classes, performances to occupy and engage him. In some ways it may be good but some ways may not be. It would be better if I could slow down and understand, support and coach him on a daily basis to help him achieve the necessary skills. We have lost some years but there is no looking back. This pandemic clearly helped us realise many areas to improve.”
If you could turn back the clock, what advice would you give your younger self?
For all the caregivers out there, we see you care. And we care for you, too. For all the professionals who are out there, thank you for coming together with caregivers to learn and grow together.
A wonderful 3,000 caregivers and their loved ones joined us at the CARECarnivals, at Enabling Village, Kampung Admiralty, Heartbeat@Bedok
Practical tips to help caregivers and special needs children transit from preschool and EIPIC to primary school
The Purple Parade 2023, held on November 4th, was a heartwarming celebration of inclusion and support for individuals with special needs, their caregivers, and supporters.
You cannot pour from an empty cup; self-care is a necessary part of being an effective caregiver. It is perfectly okay to pamper yourself to something you’d like to do, prioritise rest and lean on others when you feel weary.